“It’s not always WHAT you know, but WHO you know that counts!”

Who hasn’t heard that saying more than a few times?

And with good reason. . . . there’s some pretty good truth in those words!

It’s nice to be educated, have skills, or be well-trained.  To be the one who always knows the math answer, or the one who always spells the word correctly, or knows the meaning! Book learning and street smarts both have their place.  And either can take you just so far.

Whatever you really want to look like and really aspire to be is evident just by looking at your sphere.  Your sphere of influence, that is.

Those people who are around you.  Continually.  The ones you hang out with, talk on the phone with, associate with.

Look closely. . . . .

What does your sphere look like?

Is it full of  positive people?   Are there encouragers in the group?  More than a few achievers in the crowd?  Or possibly, is it a somewhat judgemental group?  Or a whiney bunch?  Or worse, a this-is-the-best-we-can-do-and-we’re-stuck-here group?   Yes, it is WHO you know that counts!

This concept is nothing new.  Down through the ages, you can find examples of like-minded people hanging out together.  Or great talents associating with one another.

Bottom line, if success is what you want, you better be sure some successful people are in your sphere!!

There’s never a reason to re-invent the wheel.  Look around you.  At the groups that flock together.  There is usually a common thread that runs through.

Make sure the common thread that runs through your sphere is the sort of thing that you want to be known for.  Whether it’s wealth, success, positivity, honesty, or generosity, you will look like your sphere!

Peace,

-Martha

There’s only one way a river flows.  Downstream.

There’s only one way you really want your life to go.  Downstream.

Why?  Because going any other way is pointless.  You are going against the tide.  For the most part, we are created to go with the flow.

Now, this doesn’t mean follow the crowd.  Or copy the masses.

No.  It’s about your own energy.  Where you are created to be. What you are created to do.

You only have so many  hours in every day.  Put your energy into moving yourself forward to achieve your goals. Looking  back would be like going upstream. And, let’s face it, we can’t change a single event that’s already happened!

Instead of focusing on the reasons why you can’t do something,  or why you might have failed at it in the past, just continue to flow. Continue to make progress, go forward.

When something flows,  it moves easily, smoothly, with a nice rhythm.  You know when you are experiencing it.  Runners refer to it as being “in the zone.”  Things just seem to naturally and effortlessly fall into place.  It’s a feeling of “all is right with the world.”

Now, to achieve that feeling, I’m not suggesting anyone sit around and wait for it to hit them in the noggin.

Au contraire, Pierre!

In order for something to flow, there is movement.  It’s when you stop the flow that you cut off your results.  Think about it, if you cut off speaking to a person, you have cut off the flow of  a good relationship.  Just like that.  In an instant.  Same with your health.  When you cut off exercise and smart eating habits, you cut off the flow of a healthy body. When you stop giving your money to worthwhile causes, guess what?  The flow of money coming your way will be hindered.

In everything  you do, there is a natural flow zone.   You can choose to “go with the flow” or try to go against the grain.  But why would you?  If your goal is happiness and peace, you would NEVER even think about stopping the flow.

Good energy.  It’s all around us and within us.  We can choose to stay in the flow or cut ourselves off.  There is alot of truth in the old saying, “She cut off her nose to spite her face.”  That’s what I’m talking about here.  When you cut yourself off from the flow, you are hurting nobody but yourself in the long run.

So, go flow.

Fast and furious.  It’s a great ride!

Peace,

-Martha

I love words!

They can change moods, create friendships, explain problems, soothe pain , cause happiness and create joy.

They can also just as easily cause turmoil, strife, and create suffering.  Usually needlessly.

It’s happened to all of us.

The harsh word, the cutting word, the just plain wrong word.

Words can never be “taken back.”  What a shame because it seems like the ones that should be “taken back” are the very ones that are remembered.  And dwelled on.

You know the one.  The mean or haughty remark made to us.  The one we replay over and over.  And for some, this replaying has been going on for years!

If that describes you, stop it now! Don’t participate any more.  Those words are history!

What I do want you to think about are your own words.  You are creating your life through words.  What you say projects into the future and actually determines your future!

Have you ever heard someone say something like (in my case), “I’m just not good at math?”  Well, that statement made over the course of your life, will eventually become your truth.  Maybe you aren’t the next CPA, but you could get someone to help you, practice, and eventually become “good enough.”

I want you to take a look at the word “just.”  That word in itself is mighty powerful.  It’s really a put-down of sorts.

For example, I spent alot of years saying, “I’m just a housewife.” Also, “I’m just a stay-at-home Mom.”  Every time I put the word “just” in front of my description of myself, I was discounting myself.  Pretty much saying that what I did was somehow inadequate or insignificant.

Think about this.  How many times have you said, “It’s just a penny.” Or this one.  “It’s just a minute.”  Or my favorite.  “It’s just a job.”

With that one word, “just,” you have minimized whatever it is you are talking about.  And we do it all day long.  Sometimes in reference to ourselves.  If you are referring to yourself as “just a writer, a salesperson, a parent, or just a (you fill-in-the-blank), then you need to rethink what you are saying.  You have suddenly made yourself small, unimportant and even expendable.

From the use of one word.

Put your words into your future. No more references to “just.”  No more diminishing who you are!

As my Daddy used to say, “Watch what you say.”   Describe yourself in big words.  Wonderful words that show that you make a difference in this world!   You will be creating a much better future for yourself.

It works!

How do I know?  Because, I’m not “just another blogger.”  I’m a motivator extraordinaire!

Peace,

-Martha

We all want it.

We all like it when we see it.

Patience.

It’s a great character trait to develop.  Takes time and energy but the rewards are great.

We’ve all seen the flip side.  You know, the driver who is in a hurry and is going crazy on your back fender?  Or the person waiting in line who is showing her agitation to everyone around?  I think we would all agree that this behavior usually just makes a situation worse.

What is impatience, really?  Frustration.  Anger.  Self-indulgence.  Not exactly words you want describing yourself!

Patience, on the other hand, shows tolerance, emotional control and real wisdom.   A better description of how we want to be seen, don’t you think?

Sometimes it may seem as if the patient person just has an innate calmness.  Maybe something they were just born with.  Maybe a few folks are like that but I think patience is cultivated.  Practice makes perfect.

“Patience is also a form of action.” – Auguste Rodin

Is that statement surprising?  Patience is action?  It really is.  The patient person is waiting, watching, and noticing.  Refusing to give in to combative emotions.  Now that takes time to develop.  And time well spent.

The fact is, we are never really in control of situations anyway.  That’s the job of the universe.  Whether we like it or not.  So being impatient isn’t going to bring back control, because we never had it in the first place!

Enjoy your life.  And practice patience.  It really is a virtue!

Peace,

-Martha

“People all over the world, join hands, on a love train, love train. . .”

That song from the ’70s rang in my head as I was preparing to write about an inspiring adventurer I know.

Arie Moyal.

Think one person can’t make a difference?  Think again.

One person with a vision, who takes action, can create momentum, accomplish their goal and be rewarded to boot!

That’s Arie!

The 29-year-old is a self-proclaimed citizen of the world.  He has lived in Canada, Israel, Australia, Thailand, the United States, and is already planning his next move —  to London!  The successful entrepreneur came up with a way to see the United States and help people along the way!

He is on the HugTrainUSA, spreading holiday cheer and raising awareness about mental health one hug at a time!

What’s that all about?  Arie boarded a train at Penn Station on December 27 and has been riding around the country these dozen days with a blue Santa cap on, giving hugs and raising money for Mental Health America.  How cool is THAT?

He has been sending twitter updates so people will know when his stops are so they can come out to get a hug and donate.  Did I mention, he is funding the trip himself?  Another cool thing

A couple of days ago, he came through my state of Alabama, actually stopped in Birmingham.  I was unable to meet the train, but Arie gave me a quick phone call and an update on his trek across the country.

To say he was enthusiastic is an understatement!  He was having the time of his life!

During our brief conversation, I heard of the beautiful scenery he had seen.  Cold and bustling Chicago, snowy Utah,  massive Rocky Mountains, beautiful Reno, a very big Texas, and a southern  flavor that can only be found in New Orleans!

He told of the interesting and caring people he had met. They ranged from the funny to the inquisitve to the very generous.   Some thought he was strange with the blue Santa hat (did I mention it had sequins?) and others warmed up, opened their hearts and their pockets, when they learned what he was trying to accomplish.

I also heard tales of a dining car losing a wheel, unscheduled delays, and playing games in the dark using the lights from ipods to see!

He is one inspiring guy!

Making a difference.

By using all the elements: vision, action, momentum, and goal achievement.

His rewards?  You’d have to ask him.  But, from the enthusiasm in his voice as he described the incredible journey, my guess would be that the rewards will keep coming for years on end.

Hugs,

-Martha

p.s. You can follow Arie on twitter (@amoyal) and also learn more about his hugging journey at HugTrain.org

“You can do anything you set your mind to.”

Those words were spoken to me often by my Daddy.  I don’t know if they were his originally, but he did quote them regularly.

And it’s true.

Once you “set your mind to it” – it’s pretty much a done deal.  It’s amazing what starts to transpire.

Opportunities begin to show up.  People who can help you suddenly appear. The wheels of the powers-that-be start to turn. In your favor!

Now, here’s another way to look at it.

Everytime Daddy would utter that phrase to me, it was after I had said something like, “I wish I could. . . .” or “I would like to . . . .”

He was always teaching me that wishing and wanting weren’t enough.  I had to do something!

Set my mind to it!

Do you know why?

Because, once you set your mind to something, you are totally focused on that.  You have tunnel vision at that point.  You have made the decision to go forward and nothing can stand in your way.

So, I think “setting your mind” means actually making a decision.  You go from wishing and wanting to deciding to go for it!

In that moment, you remove all the barriers, walls,and  self-doubt that you might have. That decision or setting of your mind, like magic, gives your idea or goal wings and it’s just a matter of time before it is a reality.

Why?

Because once you give your “undivided attention” (another one of Daddy’s phrases) to your project, it will appear in your reality.

Do you want your dreams to appear in your reality?  Then I challenge you:  Set your mind to it!

Peace,

-Martha

You never know where inspiration will come from!  Today, it came from another blog.

It’s no secret that there are hungry people living somewhere in all of our communities.

Chances are, you are one of the many who contribute to different charitable organizations, especially during the holidays.

Well, blogger Shelly Kneupper Tucker has come up with what I think is a pretty clever idea!  She found a way to help feed the needy and involve the internet community.

Without asking for donations.

For every comment left on her blog,  (and it doesn’t even matter which post you read!) she will contribute one can of food to her local food bank.  How cool is that??

But, that’s not where the tale ends.  Once the comments started coming in, the story got really interesting!

Once you begin to read the comments,  you find that her spirit of giving has spread to others, making them want to “do something!”

A couple of examples: One reader offered to match her donation.  Another made an extra $50 contribution to her own local food  bank, and yet a third one  offered to match the donation up to 100 cans!

This is a heartwarming story.  And one that has grown legs.  Go read it for yourself:  http://ThisEclecticLife.com

And don’t forget. . . . leave a comment.

It’s free and you will help others by doing it.  You can say you heard about it here

Peace,

-Martha

Do you ever stand in your own way?

Not that you would ever want to.  Or sometimes even be aware of it.  But we can be our own worst enemy!

During my years of selling real estate, I remember standing in the foyer of a really nice home with a client who said “I just don’t feel worthy to have a home like this.”  

Worthy?

Interesting choice of words.  

He could well-afford the home.  What he couldn’t do or was having a problem doing was changing his mind.

Changing his mind?  Yes, he already had the false belief that he was somehow beneath being able to live in that beautiful home.  He needed to change his mindset from “I’m not worthy” to “I can purchase this house, I want to live in it and I can be happy in it.”  

He was incapable of living there.  Or so he thought!   That one mindshift would have made all the difference in his daily surroundings.  His own belief system was preventing him from living in an elegant home that he could afford! 

How sad.

Are you limiting yourself?  Don’t.

There is abundance for all and you are worthy!  Embrace that thought.  See where it will take you.  Higher and higher.  Toward your dreams!  Be open to receiving your blessings.

Opportunities are everywhere!

Don’t stand in your own way or limit yourself with your own silly beliefs.  Reach higher.  You are worth it.  And you deserve it!

Get out of your own way!

Peace,

-Martha

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters to what lies within us.” ~~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Are you looking for happiness?  Most of us are.

Are you looking in the wrong place? You might be. 

Do you seek happiness in the future?  You know what I mean.  You tell yourself that as soon as you have something (bigger house, better job, compatable mate, more money) that you will be happy.

You’ve already made up your mind that you can’t be happy in the here and now.  That happiness will be yours whenever _____. (you fill in the blank)

Guess what?  That day will never come!

You can grow old chasing your future happiness.

At the other end of the spectrum, maybe you are still looking in the past.  Possibly beating yourself up for some past mistake or mishap that you believe woulda, coulda, shoulda made your life now  somehow better, happier.

Guess what?  That day is long gone!  Never to be seen again.  Let it go. 

Stop right now.  Make a conscious decision.

Choose today (to use a military phrase) to be all that you can be.  Focus on the now.  Being happy in this very moment.

Whatever it is you are looking for, you already possess.  It is within you.  It is your power to decide to be happy.

Making the shift to be in the present moment will allow your past to fade away and your future to be bright.

Trust me.  I know of what I speak. 

We are all looking for the same thing.  True happiness.  It’s not lost. It’s within you.  Go claim it today!

Peace,

-Martha

I have the most unusual experiences!

This one  is no different.

You’ve all read (I hope) my previous posts about my mother’s mishap last January,  where she ended up recooperating in a nursing home in my hometown, later to be discharged to an assisted living apartment in east Tennessee.

The saga continues. . . . .

Mom fell and broke her other hip a couple of weeks ago and has landed herself back in a nursing home to do rehab physical therapy.

I got the bright idea that I would stay in her apartment for a few days while I was in town visiting her.  It’s an interesting place.

Upon arrival, I immediately checked out her pantry.  And the new fridge with the updated larger freezer.

Holy Cow!

Three kinds of cookies, five different ice cream flavors (it’s true!), a bowl of chocolate kisses, another of Hershey’s assorted, chocolate pudding, honey buns, popcorn, and lowfat yogart (to eat in case of guilt?)  This was going to be a fun slumber party for one!

Lest you think my mother might be surviving solely on sugar, I must tell you that the main meals are served in the dining room.  And somebody else cooks them!  Yes, I could get used to this.

Living in my mother’s “space” without her is odd.

I am aware of how hard the floor is.  I notice that it’s a concrete slab covered with stylish, yet, commercial grade carpet that will accommodate rolling wheel chairs and walkers.  I am also very aware of how much that fall must have hurt.

As I go out to my car to retrieve my luggage, a gaggle of my mother’s friends gather around me.  There is no other way to put it.  These women are a tribe.  They flock together.  One thing that I notice is the comraderie.  They welcome me with open arms and  I enjoy being in the fold!  Their genuine concern for my mother and also for me was very touching.

Two sweet ladies offered to help me “turn on the lights” in the apartment.

Hmmmmmm.   Think I can do that on my own.

Another kept asking me if I had a door key.  Yep.

But later,  found myself wondering if it mattered.  Apparently not.  One of the nursing assistants came through the door “just checking on you” around 11:00 the first night!

Actually, I found as the days progressed,  this gig my mom has going on is pretty darn good. It’s a very well-kept secret.  Alot of fun times are had inside these walls.  There is something very college-like about living here. You know, everyone around the same age and there’s always somebody to talk to?

The residents, with names like Laverne, Nell, Mary Ruth, and Georgetta, wear lots of smiles, take daily walks, reminisce on the front porch, and even play the Wii.   There are some great bowlers in the group!  Working puzzles, watching and playing “Wheel of Fortune” together, reading in the library, and celebrating a birthday are just a few of the festivities I was priviledged to witness.

Sidenote: We had a little unexpected excitement one night — a tornado warning.  I will spare you the details of what a handful of suddenly awakened residents looked like but suffice it to say I knew I wasn’t in Kansas any more!

Midweek, as I scurried over to visit my mother, I found her reading cards from well-wishers from “home.”  That would be Jackson, TN, where she lived for over 60 years.  She was emotional at times.  Missing her lifelong friends.

“Make new friends,

But keep the old,

One is silver and the other Gold.”

As luck would have it, as my mother was reflecting on her friends from “home”, a van pulled up.  Out came a group of her new friends to visit her.  Laverne.  Nell.  Ann.  Friends from her new home.

“One is Silver and the other Gold”

Life is good!

Both old and new friends are helping her with the recovery process.

Later in the week, as I was leaving my temporary abode to go back to my own home, I passed the gang doing their morning exercises. They were all smiles and a few waved as I passed.  I had become “one of them”, if only for a brief moment.

I take my cue from Mother:

“One is Silver and the other Gold!”

Peace,

-Martha